The Tale You Tell

[andhiswife]

It's been a difficult week.

That's actually an understatement. But she can't let the full weight of it settle on her, not when she's out in public like this. So for as long as she's out here, doing some shopping, it's just been a difficult week.

She's told Baz and Simon about her situation. They'd offered to give her time off, but that wasn't what she wanted. The Gardens are one of the few places where she doesn't feel like climbing the walls. There's too much else going on, too many other things that require her attention. It's everywhere else that's the problem. Her apartment is too quiet and too empty and too immaculate; she can't even justify housework anymore because everything that could possibly need doing has already been done thrice over.

And she knows she has friends who would help her, who would be happy to provide company or distractions or whatever she needed. But that would require telling them. Repeating the story wouldn't make it any more real than it is already, but the thought of burdening anyone else with it -- and how could something this heavy not be a burden? -- turns her stomach. So much so that she's been politely deflecting the invitations she's received, rather than try to face anyone.

She'll say this for texting: it makes it easier to lie.

The thought of food rather turns her stomach, too, but she's getting groceries, anyway. Even if the chief appeal of cooking is making a mess that she would then have to tidy up, it's still a necessary chore. Her clothing is starting to hang a bit looser than it ought to, and she doesn't want to make new garments for what she knows, distantly, to be an impermanent state of affairs. So, groceries. She can do this.

[Find Greta looking terrible either at or en route to a grocery store, or on her way back to Candlewood. Closed unless we've spoken; hmu if you still want in.]

Comments

[a_capella_boy]

Jesse sighed and grabbed a pack of diapers off the shelf as he pushed his cart down the isle. They didn't quite need diapers yet but with a baby you always needed diapers because it was impossible to tell when you were going to run out.

"Why can't you be more regular, huh?" Jesse asked, looking down at his daughter in the carrier. She answered his question with a gurgle, which he assumed was a very wise answer he just couldn't translate.

They were basically all done with grocery shopping now and he was just seeing if there was anything that he didn't know he needed just yet. Jesse thought about getting a pie of some sorts but honestly the pie at Semele's had ruined all other pie for him. It was probably best to just go home.

Turning the corner of the isle Jesse smiled down at Ripley one last time before glancing back up. What he saw at the end of the other end of the isle made him completely freeze up. His stomach lurched and his heart skipped a beat when he saw that it was Greta at the other end.

Oh. Fuck.

[madesomenoise]

She hasn't seen Greta for a few days, but that's not unusual. She's not been worrying. Girl's on her way to the studio when she sees Greta and she steps off the curb, checking both ways before she jobs across the street.

"Greta? Hey! Hey, Greta?"

[andhiswife]

Greta's reading the label on a packet of rice flour for the third time, because nothing really got through the first two times she tried. Someone else turning down her aisle doesn't even register -- not until the person goes absolutely still. That manages to catch her attention. She glances over, then does a double-take as she realizes she knows the young man currently staring at her.

Not as well as he knows her, of course.

She should say something. He's looking at her as if... well, as if he's seen a ghost, fittingly enough. She doesn't want to be looked at that way, and if there's something she can do or say that might convince him that she's alive, that she's fine... but she isn't. Not fine, anyway, and arguably not alive -- not where it matters.

So she just stares back at him like a startled forest creature, to her own distant frustration. She must look so foolish.

[a_capella_boy]

"Nope."

That's the only thought that went through Jesse's mind. Fortunately it didn't also come out of his mouth too because that would have been really shitty to do. He'd already caused Greta enough pain and he didn't want to hurt her more but he also didn't want to hurt her more. His presence here couldn't be anything but painful and he can see it on her face. Just looking at him must be hurting her.

So Jesse did the cowardly but hopefully right thing and just turned around. He left his cart and all his groceries there and just turned around and left. Walking all the way to the end of the store in case she tried to catch him in one of the other isles he just made for the exit as quickly as possible and hoped that she wouldn't try to talk to him on the way out.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Bull was waiting for a light to change at the cross walk when someone ran into him. Bounced off him, more like. Despite his size, he moved rather quickly to rescue a grocery bag before it hit the ground.

"Easy there," he said, voice gentle as soon as he saw the look on her face. It took him a moment, but he recognized her. Greta. She'd seemed much taller when he first met her.

[on_mans_road]

Amalthea looked at her for a long time. Well, it felt like a long time, to her. Then she moved, quiet and light, and soon she was at Greta's side in front of a display of summer fruit. She reached and lightly grasped the woman's hand.

"You don't look well," she said. She rarely remembered to say things like are you alright? Of course Greta wasn't alright, so why would she ask?

[letitbetrue]

Greta looks awful.

It's a terrible and uncharitable thing for Demelza to think given what she knows of Greta's situation, but she sees her friend, sees how thin she's gotten, and she can't seem to help herself. There's nothing at all she can do to better the situation and she knows Greta had asked, but she still rather wants to belt whoever it is that told her all these details of her life. It may not fix things, but Demelza thinks it might make her feel better.

But her feelings are not the focus now and they shouldn't be.

Garrick is trotting alongside her when she crosses the street to meet Greta and his tongue lolls, his tail wagging, and she can't help but hope perhaps the sight of a dog so happy to see her might lift her mood a little.

"Hello," she says, offering Greta a small smile as Garrick noses impatiently at her fingers.

[andhiswife]

She's not surprised that he beats a hasty retreat, but the abandonment of his cart is, she thinks, a bridge too far. It's not as if she expected him to stop and have a pleasant chat. He could have backed away and picked another aisle and she wouldn't have blamed him. Honestly, she would have been relieved.

But leaving his groceries and fleeing as if she's carrying some sort of plague is ridiculous.

She stares at the cart in stunned silence for a moment or two, wondering if she ought to laugh or scream. Then she resolutely turns her back on it and walks in the opposite direction from the one the boy fled. Someone else can clean up that mess; she won't take charge of it. She has enough to be getting on with.

[andhiswife]

"Oh, Dee." Greta had rather hoped to get to the store and back without running into anyone she knows. Her smile doesn't quite reach her eyes as she turns to face her. "Hello." It's not as if she can give the girl a brush-off; she's not mean. She just doesn't have the requisite energy to pass herself off as if everything's fine. Once she's got the greeting out of the way, she falls silent, brow furrowed in mingled inquiry and apprehension as she wonders what she ought to say.

[andhiswife]

Well, that was stupid of her. She might not be at her best, but she'd thought she could at least get from the shop to her door without blundering right into someone.

Truthfully, it isn't until the figure turns that she realizes they're a someone and not a something; they're so tall she might have mistaken them for a booth of some sort. "Oh, god, I'm so--" she starts, her mouth automatically spilling out an apology even as she belatedly registers just how massive this person is. She trails off abruptly, eyes widening as she looks up, and up, and up to find a battle-scarred face crowned by an impressive pair of horns, like a bull's.

Her mouth falls open, emitting a small, stunned squeak.

[andhiswife]

No one else that she's met moves quite like Amalthea does. Even in a human body, there's a touch of otherworldly grace about her. Greta blinks, unprepared for the unicorn-girl's sudden appearance or the hand gently taking her own, doubly unprepared for the blunt observation.

She opens her mouth, half-intending to admit that she doesn't feel well. But then she remembers the way Amalthea had said that she could feel her own body dying around her, and she wonders how on earth she could justify telling her friend, this unicorn, about her own death. Why is Amalthea even bothering with her in the first place? It's something she's always half-wondered, but now, when she's already feeling miserable, it's especially hard to fathom.

Her eyes fill, and she snaps her mouth shut before her shaky exhalation can turn into an outright sob.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Her reaction wasn't new. Bull knew what he looked like: seven and a half feet tall, heavily scarred, missing an eye and the tips of two fingers on his left hand, horns. Most humans that had never even heard of Qunari looked at him like she did. But he didn't blame her.

"I know," he sad with a small smile. "It's a lot to take in. I was much smaller the first time we met."

[andhiswife]

Some of the tension leaves her shoulders when she realizes it's Demelza. There's no need to feign normalcy for her, or to account for her current state (which she knows must look rather dire). She can just be. Which only goes so far when you don't particularly want to be what you are, but at least it's easier than trying to be what you're not.

"Hello. And you, Garrick," she adds, dropping into a crouch and letting the dog sniff at her face. Animals don't require her to account for herself, either. Maybe she ought to get a dog. She's never had need of one before, and she still thinks of pets as something that ought to have a purpose, or do a job. It's odd to think of spending money on a creature for no other reason than the joy it might bring.

Or it was odd, anyway. Now, she thinks she sees the sense of it. Or maybe she just sees how bringing joy might be a job in and of itself.

"Were you just taking this one for a walk?" she asks, glancing up at Demelza as she ruffles the dog's ears. She doesn't want to think that she's interrupting anything especially purposeful (in large part because she doesn't want to acknowledge that checking up on herself might be a task worth pausing one's life for a few minutes).

[andhiswife]

"The first...?" she repeats to herself, brow furrowing. She'd definitely remember if she'd met him before. But he said he was smaller, and--and she did meet a very small fellow with horns once before, but it seems impossible that they're one and the same.

But this is Darrow, after all.

"... Ashkaari?" she guesses. "Is that--really?" She's so aghast that for a moment, she completely forgets her own troubles. An incredulous smile tugs at the corners of her mouth.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Bull flashed a grin at her. "One in the same. Ashkaari is what my tamassran called me when I was that age. It felt special to have a name that early. Come on, I'll carry this and walk you home. You can ask questions if you want."

He hoped that he'd been as charming as he thought he was as a child. He knew he'd given Krem and Dorian a run for their money that week. Hopefully he hadn't terrorized anyone else; the memories were... somewhat fuzzy.

[on_mans_road]

She saw the tears and it took her a moment to realize what they were. She leaned against Greta's arm, rested her head against her shoulder. "We could go somewhere else," she offered quietly. "A walk, or just... not here."

She remembered that Molly didn't like to get overly emotional in front of other people.

[andhiswife]

She doesn't even think to object to the arrangement. It's not as if her bag of groceries can weigh much to him, and she doesn't want to part ways when he's such a marvelous distraction.

As far as questions go, though, she doesn't know where to start. "I, er... I didn't think you'd grow up quite this much," she admits, craning her neck a little to look up at him. "How long did it last, you being a child?" That's safe enough. The only other one that immediately springs to mind is, 'what happened to you?' He might not fancy answering that one.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"My tamassran did. She was sure I'd go into the beresaad for a while. Uh, the army." Bull laughed quietly. "Yeah, hard to imagine me as that little guy, huh? I was like that for about a week. It was weird having both eyes again. It was weird to know, being a little kid again, that I'd lose the one someday."

He hadn't had a scar on him yet.

[andhiswife]

God, she is not -- she is not -- doing this in the middle of a bloody grocer's. She presses her free hand to her mouth for a moment, then nods, giving Amalthea's hand a grateful squeeze. She still can't quite bear the thought of telling her; it still feels like it would be an enormous disservice. But if they can just get somewhere quieter, that will at least be a start.

"Please," she says, not trusting her voice to say much else.

[on_mans_road]

She lightly tugged Greta's hand, guiding her from the produce section and to the door - she made sure they didn't take anything with them. They could come back.

She wasn't sure where to take Greta at first, but before long she took them down a little alley and into a greenhouse, filled with flowers. It was attached to the shop she worked in, and it was as private as anything. There was a bench that they could sit on, at least, and flowers everywhere. She sat down, still holding Greta's hand.

"Did something happen?"

[letitbetrue]

Garrick's tail wags furiously when Greta drops onto his level, his entire back end swaying from side to side as he snuffles happily at her cheek and her hair before sitting back and letting out one of those great big dog sneezes that Demelza can only be grateful he's had the foresight to aim toward the ground instead of straight at Greta's face.

"Yes, I thought I ought to take him, sometimes he do get so restless in the house and tramples all over everyone. He would go everywhere with me if he could, but when I was working at Tintern, it wasn't allowed and when he waited for me outside, sometimes people would be cruel to him."

It might be different at Green Gardens, though, and she considers speaking to Baz and Simon about it. They might welcome her gentle and yet protective dog, who would only ever lie about and let the children crawl all over him, but would stand against anyone who tried to hurt them.

"Are you headed home or would 'ee like to walk with us for a bit?" she asks.

[andhiswife]

He looks as if he has been in an army. He looks like an army unto himself, quite honestly.

"I'd assumed it was an adjustment, but..." she trails off, figuring she doesn't need to finish that sentence. "I hope it wasn't too hard on you." As if being turned into a child wasn't hard enough. Someone so young shouldn't have to think about things like the horrible injuries they've yet to sustain. She frowns, all too eager to fret over something outside herself. "Are you all right?"

[andhiswife]

She lets Amalthea lead her along. It's almost a relief, letting someone else decide where she's going and guide her there, leaving her free to think of other things, like what on earth she's going to say. By this point, she owes Amalthea an explanation. But the truth feels like both a burden and a theft.

She doesn't know if anyone stays in Darrow forever. She does know that when people do disappear, those left behind tell themselves that they've gone home to their friends, their families, to a place where they belong. Not to an unceremonious death in a Wood. She's already taken that comforting notion from Demelza, Baz, and Simon. Does she really have to take it from Amalthea, too?

Granted, a unicorn ought to expect to lose her mortal friends eventually. But still.

She blinks as they enter the greenhouse. She hadn't known this was here, and it feels a little like stepping into a different world. It's quiet, though, and they're surrounded by greenery; much better than where they were. She sits, staring down at her own lap as she searches for the right words, for some way to get the gist across without delving into the horrible details.

"I met someone who knows my story," she finally says. "It... it doesn't end well."

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"No, it wasn't, but felt good to be grown again when it was over. Ashkaari is so far away from who I am now. And it was hard to be so young but to remember, vaguely, what people like Krem and Dorian mean to me. I'm alright."

Bull offered a smile. It was a strange relief to be able to look down at everyone from his proper height again - that was something he'd missed. "You were kind to me. I remember that, too."

[madesomenoise]

Dee's faked a smile enough to know when someone's doing it and she raises her eyebrows, studying her friend's face for a moment.

"I was just thinking that I haven't seen you in a while. Everything okay?"